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〓星刻☆〓『有趣』老外最精彩一句话笑话兼豆瓣翻译

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1、I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
开始我直接求上帝赐辆自行车。 后来我琢磨上帝办事儿不是这个路数。 于是老子偷了一辆然后求上帝宽恕。


1楼2012-12-16 04:52回复
    2、I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
    我希望能像爷爷那样,安静地在睡梦中死去…… 而不是要像他开的车上那些惨叫滴乘客一样死法啊!


    2楼2012-12-16 04:52
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      3、Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
      你永远不能战胜一个纯S-B,因为他会把你的智商拉到跟他个水平,然后用丰富的经验打败你


      3楼2012-12-16 04:53
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        4、The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.
        直译:在这个世界上,我最不愿意做的事就是伤害你,但是这件事仍在我的考虑之列。
        意译a:我真不想伤害你,但你也别逼我。
        意译b:吾虽不杀伯仁,伯仁由我而死。


        4楼2012-12-16 04:53
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          5、If sex is a pain in the ass, then you’re doing it wrong…
          a. 如觉嘿一咻乃屁一眼不能承受之痛,那是你操一错洞…
          b. 若XXOO是下一体的痛,那么,是你操一错。


          5楼2013-01-15 06:29
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            6、The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
            a. 早起滴小鸟有虫虫!晚到的老鼠有奶酪!
            b. 早起的鸟儿有虫吃,早起的虫儿被鸟吃。


            6楼2013-01-15 06:29
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              7、We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
              在咱们这噶哒送外卖的都比警一察来的快.


              7楼2013-01-15 06:30
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                8、Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand.
                XXOO就象打桥牌。 如果对手不好使,自己的手必须好使。


                8楼2013-01-15 06:30
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                  9、 Some people are like Slinkies … not really good for anything, but you can’t help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.
                  有些人就像 Slinkies (弹簧玩具),没什么实在用处,但看他们在楼梯上倒腾来捣腾去还是很有喜感。


                  9楼2013-01-15 06:30
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                    10、Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
                    政客和纸尿布有一个共同点就是:他们都很有规律地被替换,而且因为同一个理由——脏了!!


                    10楼2013-03-20 14:18
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                      11、War does not determine who is right – only who is left.
                      战争不能决出正义,但能判出哪方出局。


                      11楼2013-03-20 14:18
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                        12、Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
                        a. 女人的高潮可能是装出来的。但是男人TMD可以整段感情都是装出来的!
                        b. 女人假装高潮以获取真实的感情;男人假装感情以获取真实的高潮。


                        12楼2013-03-20 14:18
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                          13、We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
                          我们永远不可能真正的成熟,我们只是学会在众人面前装逼。


                          13楼2013-03-20 14:18
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                            14、Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
                            男人就两种状态:饿 和 性饥渴。 要是他不硬,就给他个三明治!


                            14楼2013-03-20 14:19
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                              15、Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
                              光总是比声音跑的快点….这就是为嘛有些S-B只有在开口说话之后你才发现他是在**…


                              15楼2013-03-20 14:19
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